May Day in July

I've found it amusing lately that my yogurt containers have little yellow banners claiming that yogurt may help with digestion. Just like it may enable you to fly. Or it may cause you to run around in little circles singing "The Song that Never Ends." I should label everything in my apartment with little quips like "may start to wiggle," "may ring spontaneously," or "may cause you to laugh so hard you pee yourself."